Habits

Happiness Habits

This 6-week course has been developed by Action for Happiness, drawing on the wisdom of experts across many fields, to cover the habits of living a happy life and spreading happiness to others.

Week 1: Gratitude, Thursday, February 2, 2023 6:30 PM

Week 2: Self-Care, Thursday, February 9, 2023 6:30 PM

Week 3: Relationships, Thursday, February 16, 2023 6:30 PM

Week 4: Resilience, Thursday, February 23, 2023 6:30 PM

Week 5: Kindness, Thursday, March 2, 2023 6:30 PM

Week 6: Meaning, Thursday, March 9, 2023 6:30 PM

Please note: all timings are local time where the course is based. This course is based in the Worcestershire United Kingdom.

The course is run by local volunteers (Clair and Michael) and based on donations to Action for Happiness - so please feel free to give whatever you can afford :) 

Mind the Gap

This popular phrase was made famous on the London Underground. If you use the Tube for your commute every day, you probably hear the words "Mind the Gap" many times each day, possibly every time your train stops at a station.

It's a pretty simple phrase and we all know what it means - reminding passengers to watch out for the gap between the train and the platform on the Underground, which to be fair can be quite big sometimes.

The origins of "Mind the Gap" on the London Underground dates back to 1968. It came about all because it was discovered that an automated message made much more practical sense than station attendants and drivers having to warn passengers all the time.

If you have ever travelled on the London Underground you will undoubtedly have heard it.

There is another meaning for this phrase in my own dictionary and all because I am reading a book titled the Gap and the Gain, co-authored by Dan Sullivan and Dr Benjamin Hardy. It claims to be the High Achiever's Guide to Happiness, Confidence and Success. I'm not 100% sure about that massive claim, but it has changed my thinking considerably.

Are you responding like your parents or like your teachers?

There are 2 role models that shape how we respond in life. Role model no 1, your mother or father and role model no 2, the teacher who gave you the hardest time or maybe several who did.

Usually the way we were treated, when our parents and teachers felt we had done something wrong and gave their response to it in the way of punishment, ridicule or showing us up in public, is the way you now respond to situations in life. In particular your reaction and response to your loved ones, partners, siblings and children. You basically are copying what they did to you, to now doing it to those nearest to you.

Just stop and think for a few minutes and consider how you treat your nearest and dearest when I’m your opinion they have done something wrong.

Maybe have a think about how you react to drivers on the road when in your opinion you believe they have done something wrong? A tiny bit of road rage, maybe a lot of road rage? How did your father react to drivers when he drove you around or maybe your mother? Did they curse at bad drivers, at certain models of cars, at cyclists, pedestrians, older drivers? Does any of this ring true?

What is PAI?

PAI is a personal physiological activity indicator, based on heart rate data, combined with daily activity intensity and multi-dimensional dynamic comprehensive evaluation of personal physiological data, converted into an intuitive PAI value through an algorithm. It does not depend on a single item of data, while it allows you to have a comprehensive system to understand the physical condition.

Only a certain intensity of daily activities or workouts is required to acquire a PAI value. According to the research results of the HUNT Fitness Study *, keeping your PAI above 100 will help reduce the death risk of cardiovascular disease, and increase life expectancy.

Are you aware how disappointing you are?

@LinkedIn & @gapingvoid

@LinkedIn & @gapingvoid

As a consumer, I genuinely want to help the companies I buy from. Sometimes it comes out as criticism, but there is always a genuine intention to assist. Sometimes they just don't listen until you give them more direct and sometimes hurtful feedback. Take LinkedIn for example. I have been giving them feedback for years now on their customer service. I have even resorted to writing about it. You can find my articles here and here.

When you want to give feedback to brands and companies and nobody takes you seriously your love for them dies a tiny bit every time until one day you may turn around and say enough is enough. It's like the whole world falls in all at once, but it never did happen all at once, it happens a little bit at a time, usually over a long period of time. 

My wife and I stayed at a recent venue for a short retreat and when checking out, I wanted to give the receptionist, whose sole duty there was to check people out, some feedback on a couple of things during our stay.  Her answer was not unsympathetic but she answered by saying to include our comments on the feedback form, which would be emailed to us. Needless to say the feedback form was very impersonal, no place to add your own personal details and just one generic box to add comments. My love for them died a tiny bit. Not huge but it did hurt a little and whilst I could have been a raving fan, I'm now just a fan. It won't take many more incongruent experiences for me to no longer be a fan.

Brands and companies across the board struggle with this. I do understand, nowadays comments can be flying in from all directions. In the old days the only way you received customer feedback was when they were directly opposite you or you received a letter of complaint.  There was no mistaking how that feedback would be received. Now the comments can arrive in at least a dozen different ways and actually they will never find their way directly to you. They just exist in the cloud and potential customers find them, read them and decide their action. 

We are wired to think negatively or rather we have a survival instinct. This means that when we read negative reviews about a brand or company, we take them seriously. Even if it's just about food, which as we all know is highly subjective. Our primitive brain assumes that if the food is bad we could die, so we will avoid it at all costs. Yes people can get food poisoning however, I personally don't see that many stories of people dyeing in restaurants. When we absorb reviews about places to sleep, we too believe that we could end up feeling threatened in some way. Our physical or mental health could be under threat. 

I do get it, brands and companies lose customers every single day and it's natural to do so. You buy your loaf of bread from one outlet one day and then maybe some other outlet the next. And this is because very few brands and companies really think through the whole buyer's journey, from reading reviews, seeing their network's comments, adverts, the physical buying experience online and offline and the follow-up. How many times do you get a call from your baker to ask you if you were happy with your loaf today?  Not that many right?  It's just an extreme metaphor to make the point.

As the image suggests, true engagement is something you feel!

What's your view? Answers on a postcard or in the comments field below will do nicely!

LinkedIn created a brilliant eBook with my favourite illustrator. @gapingvoid (Hugh Macleod) creates the most amazing messages through his illustrations. Read more about him and @gapingvoid here: (http://www.gapingvoid.com/blog/team-members/hugh-macleod/)

Regularly I will share one of the articles and illustrations from the eBook and give you my opinion, interpretation, insight and my meaning.

@stayingaliveuk 

#contentmarketing #content #socialmedia #engagement #marketing #socialselling #sales #empathy #distraction #purpose #relevance #customerservice #help #feedback #reviews

Online is great and talking is even better. Everyone's ultimate goal in business and life is to make real connections, where you meet someone face to face. Before that meeting a conversation is the ultimate icebreaker. I value my LinkedIn connections and realise that I don't really know you or what your goals are and how I might facilitate or support those goals.  Feel free to click through and book a call with me http://styin.me/discovery-call-20mins.

Right then, what's actually causing you to be so distracted?

I'm sure you have heard that little voice in your head, you know the one that tells you that you should have done something when you haven't, the one that NEVER shuts up.  Oh and it's never positive, it's ALWAYS a negative commentary.

Well it's the same one that talks to you when you are writing, posting, liking and commenting. Constantly evaluating what you're writing, questioning whether you should have done it differently, said more or said less and even if you should have said anything at all.

Should you tap the like or the love emoji on Facebook and tapping the angry one when someone is complaining or the sad one when they're sharing some personal heartache. Is tapping the emoji enough or do you add some comments too. But what if you say the wrong thing. You’ve only got 10 seconds to add something.  Look at all those other comments, should you even bother or should you just like one of the other comments you agree with, but oh some of those other comments are dreadful, should you say something back or should you just move on. But you may be enraged with it all and your inner dragon can't resist it.

All of those voices are happening instantly and in split-second succession and you don't even know it's happening to you. And it's very likely that you were being distracted by the next post,  the next notification on your mobile and your need to write and post the next article or blogpost.

We are convinced that the distractions are outside of us and in fact they are all in our heads. We are the ones who allow ourselves to be distracted, it's never anyone else’s fault, really it isn't.

So how do you manage to stay focussed and on topic with all the thousands of opportunities for distraction?

BETTER HABITS

You are never going to drown out all those distractions but you can train yourself to develop better habits.

Better habits means getting organised around when, where and how you engage with all of the thousands of distractions that you have to face and all the tasks you have to perform. It means being organised and you decide when you allow yourself to be distracted.

Examples:

  1. Notification to say someone's tagged you? You schedule a reminder when you know you have time to look at notifications.
  2. You need to write an article or blogpost? Again schedule a reminder and block time in your schedule when you will have time to write it.
  3. Ideally you'd like to have a steady flow of posts going out to your social channels. Use a social media scheduler like Buffer or Hootsuite and there are other schedulers too.
  4. You need a source of interesting and exciting content to learn from and to repost to demonstrate your thought leadership. Investigate using RSS aggregators, like Feedly, Flipboard and others.

I have found by using the Apple reminders app and scheduling the reminder for specific days and times I am able to be far more productive and disciplined in developing better habits. It's an ongoing journey and with practice you can and will develop a better habit in reducing the amount of unnecessary distractions.

I can highly recommend The Habit Guide by Leo Babauta, who has some excellent tips and strategies to develop better habits. He also writes a great blog zenhabits.net.

What strategies have you developed for reducing the amount of distractions?

I'd love to learn and I am sure others would to, so help us out and share your answer below.

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LinkedIn created a brilliant eBook with my favourite illustrator. @gapingvoid (Hugh Macleod) creates the most amazing messages through his illustrations. Read more about him and @gapingvoid here: (http://www.gapingvoid.com/blog/team-members/hugh-macleod/)

Regularly I will share one of the articles and illustrations from the eBook and give you my opinion, interpretation, insight and my meaning.

@stayingaliveuk 🚀

#contentmarketing #content #socialmedia #engagement #marketing #socialselling #sales #empathy

Online is great and talking is even better. Everyone's ultimate goal in business and life is to make real connections, where you meet someone face to face. Before that meeting a conversation is the ultimate icebreaker. I value my LinkedIn connections and realise that I don't really know you or what your goals are and how I might facilitate or support those goals. Feel free to click through and book a call with me (https://www.stayingaliveuk.com/discovery-call/). I have blocked out only Fridays each week, excluding holidays, for calls. Hope to speak with you soon.