I used to be a serial networker when I first discovered the practice in 2005 after leaving…

Hugh MacLeod

I used to be a serial networker when I first discovered the practice in 2005 after leaving corporate life. I had been convinced that ‘network marketing’ (MLM) was the future and signed up (mug) to a project that operated in the telecoms industry called Euphony Telecommunications. Needless to say the company no longer exists. The concept was getting people cheap calls by plugging their phone into a box, which re-routed the call and you could save hundreds on your bill. I was convinced I would be the next telecoms millionaire, they promised it after all.

After falling out with friends and family who did not want to support me, they’re supposed to be your warm prospects in MLM by the way, I needed a new strategy. And hey presto business networking was it! I was introduced by someone, no idea who and I’ve never forgiven them either, to join BNI. Another mistake. Pay a big amount for a substandard unhealthy breakfast and pretend that you can give business to lawyers, printers, will writers, insurance brokers, accountants and financial advisors. They clean up at these events, because, well, every business needs those services right? Wrong!

This started my decade of being a serial networker and apart from the odd bit of loose change, I never made any substantial business from them. So I changed my approach and outlook.

I see networking events as places where I can build relationships with like-minded people. I have actually made some really great friends for many years now and I did get some business from them and ‘some’ is the key word. I am grateful of course I am, but it’s never long term sustainable business. It’s just that they wish to be nice to you.

I see networking events as an opportunity to learn from others and use any tips that I may pick up for my own personal and growth. I go to see what I can give and not what I can take. I go to listen to the people I meet instead of touting what I have to sell. Invariably I strike up a better connection with someone when I let them speak first and I ask questions to uncover their story. After all people’s stories are the most interesting part of who they are.

And that’s why I was inspired to start my own podcast ‘Share Your Story’. You can listen to it here; stayingaliveuk.com/podcast.

But, nowadays I see so many networking pundits, my new name for the organisers of networking events, spouting on about what you might be missing out on and the potential business you are losing by not attending their events. I like meeting people because working on your own can be a very lonely experience but there’s nothing better than being in the office, getting orders and working on your own projects because at the end of the day it pays the bills.

Networking costs on average £5k per year for most businesses. Be interesting to note what your ROI would be on that.

I wrote an article on this very topic back in March 2013 if you care to read it; https://www.stayingaliveuk.com/blog/2013/03/does-business-networking-deliver-sales

There is a questionnaire too, so feel free to complete it here:
http://styin.me/networkingresearch2

Have I been cured of my networking addiction? After a long while of not going to any events, it slowly creeped up on me again, like some virus. I must confess my amount of networking has increased to a level that I’m questioning myself yet again.

These are the events I have been known to attend regularly:
Tech Wednesday — It’s an evening event so I convinced myself it doesn’t interfere with my day. Silicon Canal — Another evening event and I did the same with that one. Maker Monday — Oops another evening one. Fiverr Community — Oh my god another evening one and the same excuse! Actually I haven’t been attending the Silicon Canal and Tech Wednesday events for quite a while because of other personal interests, like Taiko drumming and Yoga, so maybe I’ve only been going to two events per month after all. Not too bad then.

But then I am being told across Social Media that I’m missing out by not going to Phoenix Lunch, Gem Media Lunch, Coffee & Natter, Chutney & Chat, Cereal Network and many many others. The ‘fear of missing out’ (FOMO) brigade is well and truly at work and it does take a lot of effort to stop being persuaded to go to all of these events, spend a fortune on expenses and lost productivity.

I’ve decided on just one networking event per month and that will be in the evening and it will be based purely on who the speaker is going to be at that event. If they don’t grab my attention, I’m not going. There you have it, I’ve decided.

So now, just breathe Michael…

Michael de Groot